Where to Start (Part 3)

Posted on June 17, 2012 by MHP

A notebook for fiction writers and aspiring novelists. One editor’s perspective.

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Outlining
(…can solve a lotta problems!)

While I’m aware that some (most?) fiction writers abhor outlining — and admittedly, it’s not the most creative part of writing a novel — I’ve found that outlining can be a crucial element of story telling. Basically, you’re creating a cheat-sheet for yourself; a roughly scribbled road map containing just enough info to remind you of where you’re going, how you’ll get there and why. But while outlining, you’re also free to explore a plethora of newly perceived What if…? concepts along the way — some of which may dramatically improve your story.

Writing a novel is like a marriage. Those first 10-20 pages are the honeymoon period. It’s all fun and games, exploring new options and considering uncharted territories. But then the reality of carrying all that weight (sorry, married people) begins to take its toll. Sometimes uncertainty, self-doubt and even depression results. And then this cute-little-blonde of a new idea steps in, turns your head and there goes the marriage.

My advice? Dump the blonde (at least put her aside for a while) and persevere. Writing a novel is, and will always be, a major commitment. Stay the course.

Once you have your final chapter outlined, you’ll likely find it much easier to write toward that established end-game — even if you’ve only written a few pages of a first draft. However, once you’ve plotted those last few scenes, your characters will have sufficient motivation getting there and you’ll find yourself taking far fewer uncharted turns into the abyss.

Outlining a story doesn’t mean you can’t change your mind midway through, should a better idea come along. (Because it occasionally does.) But, if so, take the time to update your outline and feel how this new concept plays out before writing another 20-30 pages that may go nowhere. (Although don’t delete your old ideas just yet.)

If you have reservations, consider this: Outlining is the literary equivalent of story-boarding a movie. Outlining can help you reveal who did what, and when, and why. Outlining can keep track of your ‘off-screen’ characters, and can help build a timeline—very effective if you have a huge cast—and will offer you a step-by-step guide from Point-A to Point-Z. Outlining can locate dull areas (low drama levels), flaws in logic and various structural weaknesses. The better you’re able to visualize your potential story, scene by scene or event by event (or character by character), I suspect the more profound and complete your first draft will become. Outlining can essentially give your brain a head start.

Although I consider outlining a bare-bones approach to understanding a story line, it’s certainly okay to focus on bits of minutia — if that minutia is important to your story and ready to be written. For instance, a sufficient bullet point might be as simple as:

• Jackie overhears Eduardo speaking on the telephone in the study. She suspects that he’s orchestrating his wealthy mother’s murder.

• Frightened by the implications, she returns to her bedroom and….

Or as complex/complete as:

• Jackie speaks fluent French, and yet she also knows a smattering of Italian, and when she overhears Eduardo on the telephone in the study, speaking frenetic Italian to Mr. Molano, she catches a few words—not enough to decipher the conversion but aware that ‘uccidere’ means murder. She infers that Eduardo and Mr. Molano are plotting something nefarious against Eduardo’s invalid mother, well aware of the old woman’s significant insurance policy.

• Frightened by the implications, she returns to her bedroom and….

When I outline, I’m usually aware of each scene visually unspooling inside my head, as if I’m watching some sort of abbreviated, cerebral video clip. Sometimes those scenes are quite profound, and often very detailed. Occasionally snippets of dialogue or narration will occur to me out of the blue, the sort of material I typically do not include in an outline. And yet, aware that I may not remember such detail weeks or months from now, I’ll take the time to expand those thoughts or ideas as they occur. I once wrote three-plus pages of a nuanced yet crucial conversation in an outline—dialogue that made my first draft and, almost a year later, made the final draft, almost verbatim.

So don’t fret about giving your outline any definitive guidelines, as in having a word-limit or excluding a little color or texture or subtlety. If you wish to embellish, embellish. Make notes, give yourself options, ask questions: (Does Eduardo know that Jackie’s overheard his conversation? Would that additional dramatic impact? Or maybe Jackie only suspects that he’s overheard, which adds a completely different layer of psychological tension?)

S’up to you. And, yeah, I create notes to myself in red, a quick, visual reminder that certain scenes may be in need of further consideration. Remember, an outline’s solitary purpose is getting you from here to there, first page to last. Think of it as a treasure map.

I also suggest updating your outline as you continue to draft your story and expand your story arc. Characters may change, sub-plots may come and go. Various plot-essential twists and turns may develop, and keeping your outline up-to-date can’t hurt. Like your manuscript, your outline should be a constant work in progress. (Because I can be somewhat anally retentive when I write, I’ll even tag my outline versions to coincide with my manuscript. If I’m working on draft version 3.1, my outline is also tagged V3.1.)

Need a More In-Depth Look at an Outline?
Here’s an Example.

Let’s say we want to write a love story that takes place in early 20th century Boston, at a time when immigrants are flooding the Atlantic seaboard states and seeking safe communities in overcrowded, impoverished, crime-infested cities. Politicians are little more than crime bosses. Young Bobby, who’s second generation Irish, falls in love with Maria, who’s second-generation Italian. Their families live on the edge of a teetering, seething cultural dividing line between the Irish and Italian communities. Such love, in those days, is often fatal.

We want our story’s opening to be pretty standard fare.

Bobby (17) meets Maria (16) at the corner apothecary/soda shoppe down the street. (This introduction is your inciting incident). He flirts, she giggles and despite Bobby’s best intention to dismiss her, he begins fall in love. And despite Maria’s father’s objections (‘No daughter of mine’s gonna be seen with some no-good, thievin’ mick squatter from Windsor!’) Maria’s smitten as well. They begin to sneak away to the apothecary, or else meet at a nearby duck pond and talk away the long, summer afternoons. At one point Maria’s older brother, Vincente, catches sight of them holding hands. Vincente beats up Bobby, but that only reinforces his intention to marry Maria. Bobby’s older brother, Patrick, then beats up Vincente—their mothers bicker at the corner grocery, screaming in both Italian and Gaelic. Maria’s father, Luigi, threatens to lock her in the basement for a month, and repeatedly threatens to whip the poor girl senseless. Bobby’s father, Michael, likewise demands that his son stay away from this greannach girl—and yet Bobby and Maria aren’t dissuaded. They secretly plot to run away together…maybe to California, if they can save enough pennies, nickels and dimes.

Okay, so we’ve maybe written 100 pages of dramatic, intense realism, building the foundation of our story, with fleshed-out characters and brooding relationships. It’s time for Bobby and Maria to make their move. Come midnight, they’ll sneak away to board that long awaited train to California.

But perhaps that’s as far we’ve visualized the story line. All along we’ve assumed that Bobby and Maria would elope and leave their families behind—but we suddenly realize that, once they’ve boarded the train, we’re leaving most of our carefully orchestrated, dramatic roadblocks behind as well. Freeing Bobby and Maria to be themselves, and happy, will suck much of the raw emotion out of the story. Do we create new dangers on their way to California, or keep them in Boston until we can complete a few more story arcs?

Basically….so now what?

It’s the perfect time to outline any number of possible solutions. So after a number of false starts — ideas that, when outlining, are far easier easy to delete or alter than dumping 25 or 50 carefully drafted pages — maybe we find a couple of worthy concepts. So here goes:

Sample Outline. (Option A):

• Bobby’s adamant about eloping with Maria. Because Bobby’s big brother, Paddy, is wary of Bobby’s brash stupidity, he accompanies Bobby into Boston’s Little Italy to keep him safe.

• As they approach Maria’s house, they find her father, Luigi, and her brother, Vinnie, waiting for them in the shadows, holding baseball bats. ‘

• Brashly, Bobby declares his love for Maria and vowed that he won’t be deterred.

• In a rage, Vinnie takes a swing at Bobby, who ducks the blow.

• Paddy pulls a small revolver from his waste band and shoots Vinnie dead.

• Panicked, Bobby grabs Maria’s hand and pulls the sobbing girl away from the fray.

• Running from the madness, neither Bobby or Maria see Luigi kill Paddy with a blow to the head.

• ~~An Irish cop, by happenstance, sees Paddy go down, and shoots Maria’s father.~~ No! Luigi will provide far more drama as a foil if he’s still alive!

• Meanwhile, Bobby and Maria find refuge in an unoccupied, dilapidated tenement home a block away. Bobby’s tries to comfort Maria — but the girl’s distraught about her brother’s death.

• ~~An indigent wino attacks Bobby, but Bobby knocks the old guy out with a punch.~~ No! Keep the plot taut here. No need for non-specific violence. The scene is dramatic enough without the distraction.

• Maria tells Bobby she must return home in shame to comfort her parents and, sobbing hysterically, she tells Bobby she still loves him, but that her brother’s death means they can never find happiness together. She kisses him goodbye.

…and now we’ve given ourselves a new set of hurdles before the two lovers can board that train and flee to happily ever after. Note that when I outline, I will often make notes to myself, and/or cross out those ideas that don’t feel right and even include (in red) a brief rationale for my decision, should I wonder later why I found those scenes ineffective or unnecessary.

But what if we’re not fully convinced that this is our best option? Perhaps we’re still looking for other drama-rich possibilities. The great thing about outlining: It’s quick and easy and, at this point, hardly definitive. Maybe we’re still thrilled about that train ride to California, and whatever obstacles that trek may provide. Nothing says we can’t also provide ourselves with Outline 2.0. So what if…?

Sample Outline. (Option B):

• Bobby’s adamant about eloping with Maria. Because Bobby’s big brother, Paddy, is wary of his little brother’s brash stupidity, he accompanies Bobby into Boston’s Little Italy to keep him safe.

• As they approach Maria’s house, they find ~~Maria’s father and~~ her brother, Vinnie, waiting for them in the shadows, holding a baseball bat. ‘

• Brashly, Bobby declares his love for Maria and vowed that he won’t be deterred by Vinnie’s threats of violence.

• In a rage, Vinnie takes a swing at Bobby, who ducks the blow.

• Paddy knocks Vinnie unconscious with an uppercut to the chin. Bobby grabs Maria’s hand and the three of them hustle off to the train station.

• A moment later, Vinnie comes to. And aware of Bobby’s plan to flee to California, he follows them to the station.

• Paddy gives Bobby a wad of cash and they hug. Bobby and Maria board the train and wave goodbye.

• A moment later, Vinnie shows up. Seeing Paddy watching the train depart, he pulls a small pistol from his waist band and shoots Paddy dead. In the ensuing panic, Vincente makes his getaway.

• Vinnie returns home, explains that he saw Bobby and Maria board the train to California, but was a moment too late to stop them. (Does Vinnie tell his father he killed Bobby’s brother? Does he keep that a secret? Not sure yet!! Pros and cons of revealing the murder now???)

• Enraged, Luigi tells Vinnie that they’re going to California on the next train and bring Maria back home. (Will two train tickets cost Luigi his last cent? Will they have to revert to robbery to fund their journey westward?) Since Vinnie’s a murderer, do we want to make Luigi a full-blown antagonist, or ultimately more sympathetic to Bobby’s plight? Meaning, might Luigi be redeemable? If so, probably not yet, but for the moment we’re keeping that open.

And thus, with relatively little effort, we now have two potential paths of forward momentum to choose from. Even with three or four variations outlined, eventually one will emerge as our best approach, and once we decide the most dramatic, exciting choice—we’re back on track and ready to draft another few scenes or chapters.

Oh, and one last option: If the spirit moves us, we can complete our outline — finish our story — before we begin drafting again. If we can discover a direct route from the train station to that final page, and outline the remainder of our book, we have a distinct advantage of having a complete roadmap between here and there. With a complete outline, we’re pretty much assured of how to proceed to the end of our tale. We’ll make far fewer wrong turns and blunders, and follow our map and that final destination: THE END.

Remember, an outline is simply a brief, short-hand list of what goes where. One need not add color or dialogue or innuendo. (We can if we like, but it’s not essential at this point.) We’re simply jotting down enough of our bared-bones, essential story-line to remind us of where we’re going and how we’re going to get there. And, if we’ve begun our story somewhere in the middle, we can outline backwards to our first chapters and eventually connect the dots as well. And then, when satisfied, continue outlining chronologically to the book’s ending.

Do note that I don’t consider outlining a Rule-worthy necessity. While I consider it a crucial writer’s tool, I still believe it’s a writer’s choice whether to outline or not. For many writers, it’s an ‘only as needed’ obligation, and many writers don’t outline at all. S’up to you. (But keep it in mind, the next time you find yourself stuck in the middle.)

CONTINUE to Part 4: Discovering your story’s core elements.
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Where to Start (Part 2)

Posted on May 2, 2012 by MHP

A notebook for fiction writers and aspiring novelists. One editor’s perspective.

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Writing that first line.

One’s first line(s) need not be plot specific, nor allude to any sort of inciting incident. However, the opening of any story should be, must be, profound. Poignant. Riveting. Either in-your-face riveting or very subtly so. Teasing. Provocative. Your opening’s sole intent is to immediately immerse readers in whatever impending story you’re about to present. Personally, I often fool around with my opening, tweaking, nudging or even re-writing that damn sentence over and over, even after I’ve finished several drafts. And yet, somehow, I eventually find the perfect (for me) expression.

How important is your first line? Important enough to be Rule #2: Make your story’s first line enticing enough to immediately hook readers. (The only line as important is your story’s last line. So the same rule apply.)

While many novice writers believe — or in their exuberance to immediately dive into the heart of their story, insist — that their first lines abjectly define a plot, just know that a writer does have sufficient wiggle room to begin defining a character or to world/realm build first. And while: The giant meteor hurled toward the distant blue-green speck known as planet Earth. might indeed be an appropriate opener, one has the potential to muse alternatives, providing options (introducing an interesting character, or an innovative new realm, for instance) that convey excitement — a reason for readers to want to turn the page.

I’ve gathered 25 fictional first lines (and corresponding 2nd lines, if appropriate) from previously published authors. I believe these openers grab readers exceptionally well. Most of these books were or are hugely successful, but widely vary in substance, tonality and mood. These intros provide the necessary allure (whether wit, pathos, humor, suspense or a teasing overview) to read on. Some will hint of an impending inciting incident. Others are far more opaque or elusive. So, in chronological order:

“It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.” — Pride and Prejudice. Jane Austen. (1813)

“It was a feature peculiar to the colonial wars of North America, that the toils and dangers of the wilderness were to be encountered, before the adverse hosts could meet.” — The Last of the Mohicans. James Fenimore Cooper. (1826)

Charles Dickens’ 1859 classic, A Tale of Two Cities, is already (in)famous for its breathless prose, and the book’s familiar first line would be torn apart by today’s editors (or at least separated into several distinct sentences). And yet, Dickens’ emotional perception of Victorian-era London helped launch the book into Wikipedia’s Top 5 Best-Selling Novels of All Time list:
. . . . It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way – in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.

In War of the Worlds, H. G. Wells’ opener is rather amazing, given the book’s pub date. Orwell’s first line foreshadows his entire plot, and even hints at the book’s brilliant conclusion.
. . . .No one would have believed in the last years of the nineteenth century that this world was being watched keenly and closely by intelligences greater than man’s and yet as mortal as his own; that as men busied themselves about their various concerns they were scrutinised and studied, perhaps almost as narrowly as a man with a microscope might scrutinise the transient creatures that swarm and multiply in a drop of water. — War of the Worlds. H. G. Wells. (1898)

In my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some advice that I’ve been turning over in my mind ever since. — The Great Gatsby. F. Scott Fitzgerald. (1925)

Scarlett O’Hara was not beautiful, but men seldom realized it when caught by her charm, as the Tarletin twins were. — Gone With The Wind. Margaret Mitchell. (1936)

In a hole in the ground, there lived a hobbit. — The Hobbit. J.R.R. Tolkien. (1937)

In the corner of a first class smoking carriage, Mr. Justice Wargrave, lately retired from the bench, puffed at a cigar and ran an interested eye through the political news in The Times. — And Then There Were None. Agatha Christie. (1939)
. . . . An interesting aside, the British version of Christie’s book was first titled Ten Little N – – – – – – . (Yup, the infamous N-word; and the title of a familiar children’s nursery rhyme at the time. The rhyme’s plot factored prominently into Christie’s story.) In America, the title was changed to Ten Little Indians and ultimately became known as And Then There Were None. The book remains one of the best-sellers of all time.

It was a bright, cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. 1984. George Orwell. (1948).

If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you’ll probably want to know is where I was born, and what my lousy childhood was like, and how my parents were occupied and all before they had me, and all that David Copperfield kind of crap, but I don’t feel like going into it, if you want to know the truth. — The Catcher in the Rye, J. D. Salinger (1951)

It was a pleasure to burn. — Fahrenheit 451. Ray Bradbury. (1953)

In those days cheap apartments were almost impossible to find in Manhattan, so I had to move to Brooklyn. This was in 1947, and one of the pleasant features of that summer which I so vividly remember was the weather, which was sunny and mild, flower-fragrant, almost as if the days had been arrested in a seemingly perpetual springtime. — Sophie’s Choice. William Styron. (1960)

The Island of Gont, a single mountain that lifts its peak a mile above the storm-racked Northeast Sea, is a land famous for wizards. — The Wizard of Earthsea. Ursula K. Le Guin. (1968)

All this happened, more or less. The war parts, anyway, are pretty much true. — Slaughterhouse-Five. Kurt Vonnegut. (1969)

When I finally caught up with Abraham Trahearne, he was drinking beer with an alcoholic bulldog named Fireball Roberts in a ramshackle joint just outside of Sonoma, California, drinking the heart right out of a fine spring afternoon. — The Last Good Kiss. James Crumley. (1978)

The sky above the port was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel. — Neuromancer. William Gibson. (1984) This is the novel, btw, that coined the term Cyberspace.

The night Vincent was shot he saw it coming. — Glitz. Elmore Leonard. (1985)

Maybe I shouldn’t have given the guy who pumped my stomach my phone number, but who cares? My life is over anyway. — Postcards from the Edge. Carrie Fischer. (1987)

I have been afraid of putting air in a tire ever since I saw a tractor tire blow up and throw Newt Hardbine’s father over the top of the Standard Oil sign. — The Bean Trees. Barbara Kingsolver. (1988)

Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much. — Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone. J.K. Rowling. (1997)

At the first gesture of morning, flies began stirring. Inman’s eyes and the long wound at his neck drew them, and the sound of their wings and the touch of their feet were soon more potent than a yardful of roosters in rousing a man to wake. — Cold Mountain. Charles Frazier. (1997)

They shoot the white girl first. With the others, they take their time. — Paradise. Toni Morrison. (1998)

The creature watched and waited. — The Past is Never. Tiffany Quay Tyson (2006)

Micky and the naked blonde are giggling in the Jacuzzi. — On The Rocks. Me! Me! This one’s mine! (2012) …because I’m not above a little self-promotion (and I really like the line!).

I was born a colored man and don’t you forget it. But I lived as a colored woman for seventeen years. — The Good Lord Bird. James McBride. (2017)

We should have known the end was near. How could we not have known? — How Beautiful We Were. Imbolo Mbue. (2021)

Where to Start:
What Not to Worry About (Yet)

So begin… but do so with forethought and with a profound sense of purpose, of teasing or mystifying or exciting the reader. I’m aware that staring at a blank page, and glancing toward that distant finish line some 300 or 400 pages in the future, can produce a wee bit of anxiety. Of uncertainty. The common, cliché-ish and yet ultimately sage advice is to begin at the beginning. Although I admit the adage isn’t entirely helpful. Where to begin is often a writer’s state of mind at any particular moment. And where exactly to begin may not even occur to you until you’ve finished a draft or two, and know far better about who your characters are, and where they’re going. (Because it’s okay to return to Page 1 and tweak or change your premise at any time.)

My best advice is, for the moment, don’t sweat it. Don’t sit for hours, or days, petrified into inertia by worrying about precision or fretting about perfection. Just begin writing where you think your story might begin. My own first few pages will rarely remain intact, and I’ll often rewrite my opening several times before I’m satisfied. I’ve actually shuffled around entire scenes and even a few chapters to better fit my now-completed story arc.

Because that’s what first drafts are for. A writer’s constantly honing pages, re-evaluating, reconsidering. Remember that your first few drafts will be sloppy, incomplete, and often inarticulate works in progress. A first draft (or outline) is like an artist’s sketch pad, full of literary doodles and unanswered questions. If you find yourself looking intently for typos or inconsistencies in your first draft, purple prose or incomplete thoughts, you’re doing it wrong. A typical first draft is a hot mess. It’s the nature of the beast. (Also see First Drafts.)

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Where To Start (Part 1)

Posted on May 1, 2012 by MHP

A notebook for fiction writers and aspiring novelists. One editor’s perspective.

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Exploring your Inciting Incident
Also: How to jump-start creativity.

I’ve previously mentioned that finishing one’s novel is pretty damn important. So important, it’s my very own (previously stated and completely subjective) Rule #1. However, I’m aware that Rule #1 presumes that a writer already has a potential, novel-length idea in mind—and both the technical knowledge and self-confidence to begin crafted the tale exactly as envisioned.

But for many novice and/or hesitant fiction writers, that’s not always the case. Rule #1 loses a significant amount of value if you lack the experience, insight and/or courage to begin jotting down that first line.

And yeah, it takes a great deal of courage to begin a novel.

Before one even considers writing that first line, perhaps ponder your inciting incident. A misconception that some newbie writers have is assuming that “writing a novel” begins with tentatively scribbling out that first line on the first page of the first chapter. But writing a story typically begins with a vague or promising idea—one that may pester you for hours, days, weeks or even years, buzzing around your brain like an angry mosquito. Often (not always but often) this incomplete but essential What if…? premise will become either the beginning, or the crux, of your story—a simple idea that puts into motion all circumstances and events that will eventually produce a completed novel. This originating concept—whether a cause or effect, a grandiose event or random occurrence, conflict or dare, even a character’s Eureka! moment—will become inciting incident.

Or think of it this way: Your inciting incident is the necessary spark that will ignite the remainder of the story. If you were to visualize your novel’s plot (story line) as a string of exploding firecrackers, the inciting incident is you, the writer, lighting the fuse with a match. You’re telling readers that something different—wonderful or romantic or terrifying or mysterious or silly or mind-blowing—is about to happen.

For instance: What if a skinny third-grader named Johnny is beaten up by several sumo-sized fifth graders? That’s an inciting incident. Johnny begins to formulate a cunningly sophisticated, yet bloodless, idea for revenge and eventually sets the plan in motion. Either he succeeds or fails miserably. Maybe Johnny fails but learns other important lessons about friendship or love or the downside of revenge. That’s the plot.

Or: What if a nuclear power plant is struck by a massive lightning bolt in the dead of night? An inciting incident, right? Those few late-shift engineers on duty wake from a stunned stupor and suddenly realize they’re telepathic. How do they adapt to their lives in the new normal? Do they become social outcasts? Do they save the world from some secret government conspiracy? Or just always win at poker? The moment those engineers awaken and realize what’s happened to them, your story will begin to produce an endless series of What if…? scenarios, until you decide upon a viable story-line and an ultimately satisfying conclusion.

One’s inciting incident can either be prominently or discreetly plot-relevant. Your first line or opening scene need not directly relate to your story or its outcome. (See Writing That First Line). Maybe you want to introduce a character or two. Or establish a definitive time and place to better ground readers in your fictional realm. However, I do suggest that one’s inciting incident—whether revealed on Page 1 or as distant as the second or third chapter—provides a direct link to your primary plot. (It’s inciting, after all.) So provide the necessary correlation.

I realize that many writers may be unsure or only vaguely aware of where the plot’s heading when they begin writing. A solid plot might not be evident for a chapter or two. Even those with a plot in mind may not know the book’s ending for another 100 pages or so. Me? I usually have no idea how or where my book might end until I’m midway through the story. I may have a vague concept, or several potential options to choose from—but rarely is my Act III a certainty.

Some writers cobble together a plot as they write, relying on intuition and Outlining. Others don’t really care at this point (those adventurous pantsers among us. Although sooner or later, to avoid encroaching insanity, even pantsers will have to structure a definitive ending, if only inside their heads before they write that last page).

Also note that in character-driven stories (as opposed to plot-driven narratives) a central plot—or series of plots—may be little more than an afterthought. It’s the drama of human emotion that drives the book, not any particular event (an alien encounter or zombie invasion, or a murder or finding true love) that befalls a character. There may be far fewer external events and far more internal growth. So one’s inciting incident may simply be a decision to hike through the wilderness or stop for a cup of coffee at a local cafe—only to discover what might happen next. Drama is, of course, a necessary ingredient in fiction, but in a character-driven novel, the story’s outcome need not be directly connected to any specific opening. (See Character Development.)

One final thought about your inciting incident. While the incident itself need not be grandiose or imposing—lightning need not crash, thunder need not rumble—think of your inciting incident as whatever gets your protagonist off his/her butt and into motion. Without that inciting incident, your hero would likely sit passively in front of the TV, eating bon-bons, waiting for something to happen.

Your inciting incident is the something that happens.

Jump-Starting Creativity

Most fiction writers are overflowing with creativity. Daydreams and potential story ideas flood our waking hours, and sometimes fill our dreams as well. And yet our zest to actually begin writing a novel can freeze our thoughts and suck dry our best intentions.

So what happens when we’ve concocted a potentially marvelous character or two, but suddenly realize they’re all dressed up with nowhere to go? Or perhaps we’ve visualized an impressively complex realm or a dazzling location—cabaret-rich Paris in the 1920s, or a colony on one of Jupiter’s many moons, or an alt-reality where dragons rule the skies and magic permeates everyday life. How to populate such a potentially fertile environment with a suitably engaging story? So many possibilities, so few brain cells!

If you don’t have a basic plot in mind, don’t overthink your options just yet. My suggestion is to start with a simple, basic concept… and see where that might take you. For the moment, you’re just looking for that aforementioned inciting incident.

For instance, let’s say that we’ve envisioned a medieval type fantasy, filled with warring castles and jousting knights, with dragons and fair maidens and evil wizards and such.

A young knight sits on his trusty stead, observing the castle’s yawning gates. Let’s call him Sir Navnløs. His horse’s name is, dunno—Pepper. (We’re just making stuff up at the moment…because that’s how novels are born.) Sir Navnløs has never ventured this far from his village, and cautiously ponders the overwhelming size of this newfound kingdom.

Okay, to make our story a bit more interesting, let’s make this is a mystical realm. Lord Navnløs knows a bit of magic, but his skills are sketchy. Sometimes his spells work. Sometimes they don’t. Which may lead to some interesting drama later in the story. We need not dwell on what sort of magic Lord Navnløs knows just yet—we’re teasing a bit of info for readers to ponder. We’re character-building, plumping up our young night’s personality with powers that might come in handy. (Think “Hodor.”)

So why is Sir Navnløs even here? Maybe he’s searching for something specific. Excitement and adventure? That’s kind of vague. What if he’s looking for his lost sister, or his long lost father, or even for his lost dog, Spoticus. Or perhaps bandits have sacked his his village, and Sir Navnløs is seeking revenge. Their tracks lead here, to this castle. So he’s gonna ask around.

He enters cautiously crosses the drawbridge, aware of archers watching him from the turrets… but then what? Maybe he begins to lead Pepper through the castle’s bailey (courtyard)—a great time to reveal some mondo scene-setting. Is it a ginormous castle? Old and rundown? Or magnificent in overwhelming splendor. Bustling, energetic? Is it raining? Sunshiny? Grey and misty? Is the young knight aware of tantalizing aromas? Are animals braying? Are the stone streets alive with the horns and drums brightly-clothed musicians? Or maybe not. Perhaps he confronts a more ominous scenario. Are bodies hanging, rotting, from the gallows? Ravens circling overhead or munching on the corpses? Are the streets suspiciously empty? Do fearful eyes observe him cautiously from doorways? (Whichever direction you proceed, you’ll immediately open up more options, more possibilities. S’up to you.)

Perhaps Lord Navnløs spots a fair maiden cowering in the street, being bullied or beaten by an angry young man in noble garb—a prince of some sort, Lord Navnløs deduces. He’s displeased by what he sees, but he’s a visitor here, and the nobleman is obviously his ‘better.’ What can he do without losing his head? Perhaps he has a sudden, clever idea. Maybe he…?

Or… what if Lord Navnløs is instead met inside the gate by a dozen knights on horseback, in full armor. They’re about to embark on a dangerous mission to slay a dragon, a cranky creature burning nearby villages and eating babies like popcorn. The captain of the guard gruffly insists that the young night join them in the hunt! And by the unrelenting snarl on the captain’s face, Lord Navnløs realizes he has little choice but to agree. Ready or not, adventure looms…!

In either scenario—the abused fair maiden or the potential bout of dragon slaying—that’s your inciting incident, a single occurrence (grandiose or subtle) that propels the remainder of your story forward. It’s the spark that ignites all the drama and passion, all the twists and turns, all the head-lopping, maiden-saving and dragon-slaying to come. Once a writer has an inciting incident in mind, the rest of the story should eventually fall into place. (An Outline at this point may be advised.) Or else it’s time for a little more contemplation, percolation and deliberation to concoct various additional What if…? scenarios sufficient to infuse your story with a constant stream of drama and excitement.
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Good Writing, Bad Advice

Posted on January 2, 2012 by Dave Workman

A notebook for fiction writers and aspiring novelists. One editor’s perspective.

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Good Writing, Bad Advice.

My name (once again) is Dave Workman. I’m a developmental (content) editor IRL. I’m also an author. Over the years, I’ve accumulated a bit of knowledge that may help new writers beginning a long and often arduous (although hopefully rewarding) journey. Might I impart any significant pearls of wisdom on this page? I offer no assurances. Nobody in this business—in any business—can guarantee success. Finding a publisher is sometimes more luck (sadly) than skill. Good timing rather than dedication. Sometimes it’s who you know. Sometimes it’s who your daddy knows. Success is a subjective son-of-a-bitch with a chip on one shoulder and a crazed twinkle in its eye.

But knowing how to write well can’t hurt. And knowing a few basic rules along the way can definitely ease the process. Success may be elusive, but for an unprepared or apathetic writer, success is probably little more than a fuzzy daydream.

Do you know the Numero Uno, Most Common, Most Discouraging, and the Tragic Likely Outcome of all novel writing endeavors? It’s not finishing the book. Losing interest or losing your way, losing your nerve or losing your religion. It’s fear of success or fear of failure or fear of wrestling all those words into place, from “Once upon a time…” to “The End.” And if you can overcome those fears and finish a manuscript (even a first draft!) you’re already closer to success than most.

Finish the book. That’s Rule #1.

In this and subsequent posts, I’ll attempt to reveal what many publishers seek in terms of a desirable manuscript, although—bottom line?—it’s very likely a polished, professional and unique voice. Yes, voice. A publisher (or agent) is far more likely to accept an uncanny voice over a complex, complicated or convoluted plot structure. Lock two characters in a closet, give them exceptional dialogue and quirky or witty personalities worth exploring, and a publisher will likely consider that manuscript over a done-to-death story about brain-sucking aliens attacking Las Vegas. (Although if your aliens have quirky, well-constructed personalities, a publisher will take a close look as well.)

But let’s face it—only so many finite plot-lines exist in literature. They’ve all been covered ad nauseam. Boy meets girl. Boy loses girl. Boy is eaten by giant squid. (It’s been done.) But a unique voice is yours alone. Exclusive. Inimitable. Priceless. For a writer, creating a unique voice by infusing excitement, passion, eccentricity, pathos, wit and charisma (or all of the above) into a distinctive character can be money in the proverbial bank.

Okay, enough preamble. Although I do have one significant bit of advice to share: Don’t listen to anybody (and certainly not to me) if the advice doesn’t resonate. Go with your gut. Go with your own instincts. By all means, listen selectively to proffered advice—accept feedback when it’s constructively given—although I suspect some 80-90% of what you hear won’t work for you. However, that remaining 10-20% might may prove priceless. So do keep an open mind! (See Confronting Criticism.) Remember, success is as much about breaking rules as following them. If it feels right, crayon outside the lines. I think Gandhi said that. Maybe not.

To illustrate, here’s a true story. This one still gives me nightmares. I still wake up cringing.

The most single, most horrific, most god-awful perverse piece of advice I’ve ever encountered occurred during a week-long writers’ conference in Southern CA. (And while a writers’ conference can be a wonderful, magical, scintillating experience… again, be careful who you listen to.)

One evening, a panel of “editorial experts” bequeathed their brilliance to a capacity filled auditorium of eager, fledgling writers. An attendee stood and asked a panelist a question, and in doing so happened to mention that her nearly-completed novel filled some 360 pages. About 90,000 words.

Without a moment’s preamble—without a speck of empathy or a grain of intelligence—the so-called expert replied, “It’s too long. Cut twenty thousand words.”

This Expert of Knowing Everything While Knowing Nothing had no clue about the nature of the story or its genre, or of the writer’s level of craft, the tenor of the book. Simply “cut it.” The writer was, of course, crushed. And I have never forgotten my frustration over that absurdly idiotic remark.

Should anyone tell you to arbitrarily cut (or add) pages without otherwise knowing your story—it’s intent and purpose—smile politely and walk away. I’ve read too many manuscripts that feel truncated and unfinished… only to discover that the writer had been previously advised to “cut, cut, cut!” without further direction or counsel. In desperation, many writers blindly begin hacking all the style and nuance from an otherwise excellent story.

Think of a novel as a living, breathing person. If I feel that your story needs to lose a bit of weight, I’ll not advise you to remove its liver or stomach or left arm. The process is to shrewdly exercise your book—trimming adverbs, adjectives and excess verbiage like so many bloated fat-cells. Eliminate scenes or chapters that do nothing for the story but flatter your ego. Prune those sections carefully, little by little. Or feed it more Skittles, should the opposite be true.

I acknowledge that the above-referenced workshop occurred before the Age of e-publishing. Stricter rules applied once upon a time (although stupidity didn’t count back then, either). And I continue to hear agents and editors and the so-called “people in the know” advising writers to cut or add pages, to alter a manuscript in order to satisfy some personal itch or the guidelines of a publishing system that no longer exists.

The biggest problem today? Since the emergence of e-books and self-publishing (around 2008-ish), the industry remains in flux. No one’s certain of the new rules yet. But in this rapidly changing paradigm of 21st century novel writing, here’s my best advice: Trust yourself—and hone those basic skills of storytelling in the (somewhat paradoxically) simplest, yet most exciting voice you can muster.
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Posted on January 1, 2012 by Dave Workman

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A notebook for fiction writers and aspiring novelists. One editor’s perspective.

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Welcome to the blog!
……Here’s what’s what.

My name is Dave Workman. I’m an author and freelance editor (formerly an acquisitions and developmental editor for Muse Harbor Publishing). Several years ago I began writing Rules of Engagement for beginning (or curious) writers, based on what I perceive to be fundamental obstacles that many of us confront when starting, or struggling through, a new novel. Perhaps I can offer useful advice—or maybe not—although I certainly know what excites me as a reader. Thus, the following comments (although RoE remains a work-in-progress) may be worth a look.

INTRO. Good Writing, Bad Advice. Ultimately, it’s your book.
Rule #1: Finish your book.

1. Where to Start. (Part 1). Exploring your inciting incident.

2. Where to Start (Part 2). Your first line should be the most thoughtfully crafted sentence of your story. • Also, don’t know exactly how or where to start? (I have a suggestion.)
Rule #2: Make your story’s first line enticing enough to immediately hook readers.

3. Where to Start (Part 3). Outlining. (If you’re a first-time novelist, outlining may be more important than you think. Even if you’ve written a dozen-or-so novels…it’s still important.)

4. Where to Start (Part 4). Getting down to it. (Starting for real).
Rule #3: Write to please yourself.
Rule #11: Get acquainted with your story.
Rule #100: Expecting perfection? Well, get over yourself. Beginning a novel is often messy, complicated and fraught with sleepless nights of panic, self-doubt and uncertainly. However, trust me, you’ll improve. Patience, pilgrim… patience. (Also see #13: Perfection below.)

5. First Drafts. Writing is a two-part process. Part 1: The Idea. And, Part 2: The Implementation. A first draft is how writers make that often difficult transition between creative right-brain thinking and logical left-brain doing. • Also, don’t expect perfection (or even coherence) in a first draft. It’s not a finished product, just a tool we use to ‘get where we’re going.’

6. A Few Common Obstacles. The 6 most common obstacles that most novice novelists confront.

7. Fundamentals. Discovering those so-called ‘pillars’ of a successful novel. Sometimes it’s nature. Sometimes it’s nurture. Success is likely a combination of both.
Rule #17: Make a hard copy (paper) back-up of your manuscript every now and then, even when working in draft mode. (See Finagle’s Law. But brace yourself.)

8. Simple, But Exciting. Juggle precision with passion. • Also: Introducing the novel’s Three Essential Components.
Rule #7: Write in clear, precise sentences. Communicate to your reader in intelligent thoughts, carefully constructed, while providing a constant, continual procession (discreetly or indiscreetly) of relevant information.
Rule #5: Continually 1. scene-set; 2. character-build, or; 3. move the plot forward. When writing fiction, nothing else matters. Page by page, a good novel should seamlessly blend all three components.
Rule #13: Readers don’t read novels to find out What Happens. They read novels to find out What Happens to Whom. Sufficient character development is as essential as your plot.

9. Exciting, But Simple. Juggle passion with precision.
If you’re not fully engaged in your writing, potentially dull and tedious prose won’t thrill readers. But innovative, excited, passionate writers tend to produce innovating, exciting and passionate prose. Too much passion, however (the dreaded ‘purple prose’) can quickly drown a reader in the unintelligible. So it’s important to find that balanced, literary ‘sweet spot.’

10. Active Writing (Part 1). Active Voice. How to find it. How to keep it.
Rule #8: Keep characters in motion. Either through action or dialogue, you’re continually pushing characters toward drama or pulling them away from drama. Also see Show, Don’t Tell below.

11. Active Writing (Part 2). Active Language (Grammar).
Rule #6: The Jumping Cow Rule (Active vs. Passive Voice).

12. Active Writing (Part 3). Active Composition (Plotting)
Rule #14: Develop your story from A-to-Z. Know where you’re going.

13. Perfection. Do your best, and then move on.
Rule #25: Perfection in writing doesn’t exist. (Don’t burn out or waste years attempting to find it.)
Rule #4: Do the best you can. That’s all readers can ask.

14. Action/Reaction. A novel is an endless series of relevant connections. Every paragraph you write is like a puzzle piece that must fit into a specific, coherent place within a specific, coherent premise.
Rule #10: In fiction, for every action, provide an appropriate reaction. Over and over and over.

15. Show, Don’t Tell. What’s it even mean? Because we’ve all heard this advice a thousand times before… but it’s still a valid axiom. So don’t dismiss it! • Also, exploring E-Prime writing.

16. What’s Your Intention? A brief guide to rational writing.
Rule #29: Your characters may remain mysterious, elusive or distracted, but your prose must remain clear and concise.

17. Focus on the Now. Stay in the moment.
Rule #16: Focus on the now. Write one thought at a time, and don’t worry about the rest.

18. My Favorite Films About Writers and Writing. A personal aside.

19. Finding Your Voice (Part 1). Find a style and stick with it.
Rule #9: A great novel is not so much what you tell, but how you tell it. All writers develop a unique style. Finding yours is imperative.

20. Finding Your Voice (Part 2). Do your characters speak to you?
Rule #12: Shut up and let your characters tell their own stories.

21. Finding Your Voice (Part 3). Point of View: Narrative vs. Authorial Voice.

22. Basic Plotting (Part 1). Right Brain (creative thinking) vs. Left Brain (critical thinking). Unfortunately, we need both halves.

23. Basic Plotting (Part 2). Fiction is all about drama. (Even raucous comedies are about the drama.) So don’t dismiss the drama.
Rule #27. Make drama (big drama, little drama) your novel’s constant companion.

24. Story vs. Plot. What’s the dif? • Also, resolving the “My-story’s-too-short!” dilemma.

25. Action vs. Information. The Oil & Water of Novel Writing.
Rule #26: Don’t mix Action and Information scenes. Keep these two incompatible concepts (relatively) separate.

26. Dialogue (Part 1). Writing Great Dialogue: An Absolute Necessity.
Rule #30: Create dialogue that—like the basic fundamentals of fiction—accomplishes one of three specific goals. Dialogue must: 1) Set a scene; 2) Develop/refine a character and/or; 3) Move the plot forward.

27. Dialogue (Part 2). Writing Great Dialogue: Balancing reality and fiction — two very distinct styles of chit-chat.
Rule #39: Never reveal too much relevant information too quickly.
Rule #39A: ...but relevant or not, always keep dialogue witty and compelling.

28. Dialogue (Part 3). Writing Great Dialogue isn’t about epic plotting. It’s simpler than that. Rule #41: Great fiction isn’t about ‘what happens.’ It’s about ‘what happens to people.’

29. Dialogue (Part 4). Dialogue vs. Internal Monologue. The key to precise communication with your readers is knowing when to use what. • Also, Communication via TV, Radio, Social Media and Texting

30. Dialogue (Part 5). Writing Great Dialogue in First Person (POV).
Rule #45: First Person POV readers aren’t expecting absolute authenticity so much as absolute personality.

31. Dialogue (Part 6A). The Q. & A. page.
Rule #48: Don’t use dialogue as an alternative to directly depicting action or drama.

32. Dialogue (Part 6B). The Q. & A. page (Cont’d).

33. Dialogue (Part 7). Attribution. (AKA: Dialogue Tags.) The ‘he said/she said’ of writing dialogue. Because sometimes visual subtleties matter.
Rule #55: Don’t just write dialogue, write active dialogue. Avoid ‘talking heads’ scenes by maintaining visual stimulation or plot momentum during scenes of intense dialogue.

34. Dialogue (Part 8). When not to use dialogue.

35. Character Development. Quite possibly the most important part of your story.

36. Scene-Setting. Scene-setting is often the most overlooked of the three essential components of novel writing.
Rule #28: Every scene we write, before we begin (or before we continue) to propel our plot forward, we must establish a viable setting for our characters, and a firm grounding for our readers. And we must do so every time we move a character to a new time or place, scene after scene.

37. Confronting Criticism. Sooner or later, we all confront criticism. How we regard such feedback can be crucial to our eventual success.
Rule #99: Knowing the difference between constructive criticism and counter-productive criticism is crucial. (And this is where I tell you why.)

38. Write The Daydream. What’s a novel, but a daydream we write down and embellish, expand and hone into something coherent, dramatic and hopefully entertaining?

39. More Common Obstacles. Are you still finding those first few scenes/chapters difficult or impossible to write? I’ve already mentioned a few common obstacles that writers face. (See #5 above.) Maybe it’s time to look inward and investigate further.

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